For example, an English person called Bob might introduce themselves as “Bob”, whereas an American person called Bob might introduce themselves as “Bahb”. (Sorry, don’t know the phonetic alphabet but hopefully you get my gist)
Should you pronounce those two people’s names the same, with your own natural accent, or should you copy how the person says their own name?
Edit: I specifically picked a generic English name with different pronunciation across different accents. I know my wording wasn’t great, sorry! Hopefully the edit is a bit clearer.
Context and other languages
When pronouncing a name from a different language, I firmly believe you should copy the pronunciation of the owner of that name, and not Anglicise the name unless asked to. I say this as a speaker of a language that English people regularly mispronounce and even insist to me that they know the correct pronunciation of my language.
I work with a lot of people around the world and I feel like I mangle my foreign coworkers names so badly, despite my best efforts, especially if I’ve never heard anyone else call them by name before. Sometimes if it looks too intimidating I’ll just ask how to pronounce it and do my best to mimic what they say. Most people are super understanding and helpful and sometimes even amused, but I have to imagine it must get a bit tiresome. I can totally understand why some of them choose to use “western” names instead, and I respect their choice if that’s what they want me to call them. I probably would too if I were in their position.
Still, I wish I was better at it and could easily speak their native name, I feel like it’s more respectful when I can finally get it right.
The name owner is the only authority that counts about how to pronounce their own name. Asking them is always the best place to start, even if it seems obvious. Especially if you say you often mangle names and appreciate being corrected whenever you get it wrong. That’s helpful when you haven’t interacted in awhile and forget, because you can just do your best guess, with a questioning tone, and they will correct you if it’s bad enough to bother them.
To add to this, accept when people tell you it’s fine to pronounce their name wrong. My name is very hard to pronounce if you don’t speak my native language, and I prefer that people mispronounce it the “obvious” way, instead of trying to approximate it because then I have people calling me by 20 different variations, and sometimes I’ve no idea they are referring to me.
If I was the one on the other end of the equation, that you would be willing to make the attempt would invite immediate respect, and I wouldn’t hold it against you if you never got it right. Like I said, ‘hey you’, or - failing that - ‘oi cunt’ will do. Mind you, I’ve worked abroad in… fairly special places, namely the games development industry.
We don’t stand on ceremony much.