Early Access karma whoring.

No, but it is raising some alarm bells.

No, but I found Waldo.

Garçon means boy.

I mean… They’re not fucking wrong.

Maybe, but as I always say, today’s “crazy conspiracy theory” is tomorrow’s news.

Only if you’re inclined to believe the conspiracy theory first.

Doesn’t mean plenty of them don’t know or care that he’s trying to put microchips in people’s brains.

Now, here’s the thing. I’d say you would be sharing those winnings with the original winner unless you prevented them from getting the ticket

The January 2nd Powerball draw was not won by anyone and paid $39M.

That’s plenty of seed money to invest in Google, Bitcoin, et al with perfect knowledge of stock trends. Even if it’s only short term knowledge due to breaking from the original timeline, you could easily grow your investment into the billions overnight.

Perhaps the most amazing stock of the year was Xcelera.com, formerly known as Scandinavia. Once a closed-end fund specializing in Scandinavian stocks, and then an operating company that owned a hotel in the Canary Islands, it made a small investment in an Internet company last year. Before it disclosed that investment, the family of Alexander Vik, the company’s chief executive, was given options to buy a million shares of stock, at a price of $3.25 each. The shares ended 1998 at $3.75, or $1.25 adjusted for two subsequent splits. They ended 1999 at $139.50, an increase of 11,060 percent. The Viks’ option position is now valued at $415 million.

That’s not so much losing your home as it is having it forcibly purchased from you at a fair market price. At least in theory.

Half Life 3.

They’re everywhere man!

It’s not my theory, but did you have a stroke?

How many people are neatly snapping their phone into two halves?

As a former cell phone repair tech: Quite a few more than you might think.

Typically when you win a lot and they don’t suspect cheating, they give you a swanky room so you stick around and try to double your winnings.

“Do you have any feelings whatsoever about the way automobile taillights work in the US?”

“No, why would I?.”

“After you watch this video, you’re going to write your congressman.”

What kind of friend wouldn’t allow ear licking?

bloviating

What a wildly inappropriate waste of a thesaurus.

the slightest bit of research

Are you competing in some obscure Internet irony competition?

Write that article and post it in a blog. Use ChatGPT if you need to. Bang, you’re the media.

I mean, you’ll want to do all the SEO things to drive your hit rate, but this ain’t the old days anymore where major media conglomerates control the news.

Alexa, bite me.

This used to be a feature that you could filter by on GSMArena, but alas it has gone from even there.