Ahh yup.

So, a hole in a bucket? Doesn’t sound right.

I have ADHD (sorry wrong club) and this is me. I’m literally playing on my phone in the bathroom at someone else’s house on Christmas Day to reduce some people time.

Yes, but at least this stands a good chance of a few seasons.

Burns the ding dong

What’s layman words for this please?

Wiggle the little stalk at the top, if it wiggles nicely, it’s ripe. Takes a little to get the feel for wiggle to ripe ratio, but it’s a really good indicator.