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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: July 4th, 2023

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  • I don’t know if this will help, but as someone who struggled most of my life with my own undiagnosed list of mental issues, I worry so much about my children and the issues that they inherited from me. Getting diagnosed and learning more about my issues has helped me understand a lot about myself and my dad (who I inherited most of my issues from). Understanding doesn’t mean fixed though. I am still struggling with myself, and my dad, all while trying to teach my kids about themselves and trying to help them avoid, or at least navigate the issues and trouble that comes with being different. I stress so much and work so hard to make sure that they don’t have to suffer like I did. But, even knowing how hard I try, I am still amazed and even stunned when they do or accomplish things that are beyond what I could even have envisioned as my “best case scenario”. There are times when I don’t have the answers and they have to suffer much like what I did, and that absolutely destroys me. But there are also times when they sail right through as if it was nothing. It’s feels a lot like I think the parent of the first penguin to just pop out of the water and land on shore must have felt. Can you imagine spending your entire life fucking struggling to get on shore and then stand for your entire life? Having watched everyone you know, your parents, and your grandparents all struggling their asses off, and being terrified that your kids might have it worse than you, or maybe even be one of the ones that never makes it out of the water… And then the first time they get in the water, they literally just pop right the fuck out and walk right the fuck off?
    I don’t know you or your dad, maybe he is just a raging dumpster fire of a parent. Or maybe he is stunned that you are casually doing something that he could never even hope to do himself.



  • Computers can’t do random. They usually approximate random by truncating seconds since epoc and throwing them into an algorithm the hashes them up into something that’s sort of random. Problem is that time is not really random. You ever notice that your random music shuffle seems to play the same shit all the time? Unless of course somebody else is there to listen, then it plays crazy shit you’ve never heard before. It probably has less to do with luck and more to do with you having regular listening habits, and the times that it plays crazy shit is those times that you are listening outside of your normal habits. And then there’s the algorithm that they use. There’s been a number of digital games that I have stopped playing because the “randomizer” was so shit that I could begin to “predict” future rolls.


  • That’s true. I hadn’t realized how little it uses the GPU. I have had other 3d cad apps that I have worked with that were impossible to run on a server without a well above average video card, so that was definitely my first thought.
    I guess one thing he could do is try some other opengl apps on his server and in the same docker. I have seen some badly configured servers and docker instances that fell back to rendering everything to bitmap.and then using some antiquated x11 bitmap handling routines to transfer the images. The handling of the images was so slow it was impossible to use.



  • Then it is under something. Whatever it is under is something that there’s no way it could be under. The item it’s under is either clear so that you can see everything under it, or waaaaay the small to cover up the entire thing without you seeing it. Either that or the cats played with it and pushed across the house.

    I find that if I turn on a flashlight, even just the flashlight on my phone and then put it close to the ground so that it shines parallel to the ground that I will often see stuff that I couldn’t see before. It seems to work on things from the size of a tiny screw up to something like a large remote. It could be the change in the shadows makes your brain reprocess what it is seeing, or it could be some kind of summoning spell.




  • This is entirely true for certain types of development. There are plenty of coding jobs where you are constantly writing and rewriting the same type of thing over and over again. UI development, web page development, ect. Any place we you have multiple “customers” wanting a similar thing done, but with a different look or aesthetic. Or maybe you work for a company that makes stuff that needs to be refreshed every so often to avoid looking antiquated.

    But then there’s also lots of people who are constantly doing things that they have never done before. I am not even talking about the poor suckers out there right now have having to “add AI” to random shit right now without even having a clue wtf that even means. You have plenty of people doing what is essentially “we want you to do this thing we have never done before”. How do you estimate time on a ticket that essentially says, take this 30 year old pile of code that has been hacked and rehacked by dozens of people (all who have either retired or left the company to escape this dumpster fire you are being handed) and “fix this bug” that has been around for a decade. It’s been there for a fucking decade. When the first version of this ticket was originally generated it was done in a ticketing system that has been replaced by 2 generations of ticketing systems since then. Whatever the issue is, it’s a big enough issue that it can’t be answered with “can’t do/won’t do”, but at the same time everyone who has been assigned it in the last decade has at best created half ass work arounds. Good luck with pulling a number for how long it is going to take you to figure out what the bug even is, much less how to fix it.


  • Easy peasy my friend. Divide and conquer. I open all the mail, sort out the garbage from the important stuff. I throw away all the chaff and bullshit, sort that into important stuff that needs attention, and important stuff that needs to be kept track of.
    I then throw the important stuff that needs to be held onto but requires no action, into a box with the year (or at least a year within the last 3 years) written on the side. And then every 5 years or so I throw away the old boxes.
    At that point, what’s left is just a few pages per week that I then give to my spouse so they only have a couple of things to deal with.

    They then take those couple of pages and put them on top of the ever looming pile of toxic things that we will never dare to touch again.

    However, this pile is strategically placed so that it can’t be missed, and acts as an anxiety point that drives us to do other tasks that would normally be avoided, but now seems like a nice diversion in the shadow of “the pile”.

    Or at least that’s the way it used to work, but now we just avoid that room completely.





  • I like to act like they just reminded me that she asked me to talk to them about it and then start talking about some really bizarre fetish stuff that she can’t deal with anymore.

    One of my favorite ones actually got gagging noises from another person in the room. ‘Look, she asked me to talk to you about the diaper thing. Hold on. Don’t get upset… she’s fine with you wearing them, and even fine with you “soiling” them, but she can’t deal with you bringing them in “pre-soiled” anymore. It’s not like it happens every time you put on a different one, but even if only 1 out 10 has an issue with cough “leakage”, that’s still at least 2 times per night that she has to stop and clean it up or else the smell just like never leaves the room… and anyway, she says that really kills the mood.’






  • I have the same hyper sense of justice and so does my kid. Even knowing what is going on and understanding what they are dealing with, it is insanely difficult to try to get my kid to understand how to walk the fine line between being a good human/citizen and being a danger to themselves and society.

    It’s really amusing sometimes to catch people’s reactions as you explain to a child that sometimes lies are the right choice. That the truth is sometimes not only needlessly cruel, but also unjust and unfair.