Pssh, you believe in the moon?

Woo I watermelons!

Laughs in Teams.

On the internet, nobody suspects you’re a Pom.

Nah just send each to the other hemisphere.

It’s the 11th here, so not the whole world.

Yoink’d

My card’s PIN is just the date when the bank reset it for me… 20 years ago.

I changed banks and I set my new card to the same PIN.

It’s sentimental at this point.

Yeah I always try to bring up our award to shut down the “but the well tipped waiters will lose money if you mandate a minimum wage” argument.

As though a minimum wage has to stay $7.

Our waitstaff get $35/hr on weekends and somehow we still have enough small cafes to bankrupt Starbucks.

$23 is the national no award minimum, but the restaurant award mandates $29 for even a level 1 casual.

Yeah we stopped being on Arizona time in the 70s.

24 years old.

Even its “rerelease” was 10 years ago tomorrow.

Yeah 3 days before? I only found out it was DST this weekend just gone because I happened to still be up.

Me: man it’s almost 2am, I should go to bed
DST: lol 3am

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Our weird shit on a map

Short for swimming costume.

“very good sir, I shall remind you in 9 minutes”

Coming out of the lake and I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta get out because I wanna walk

just

Classic IT.